“He’s out there living his life, and I’m over here stress-eating jicama.”
Tag: Overheard
#104
“Jesus did not, in fact, travel all the way to earth, uphill and in the sand, to give you the freedom to act like a child of Satan.”
#94
“Did that sound dumb when you said it?”
#83
“You know what’s better than being sad?”
“Hm?”
“Cake.”
“Are we having cake?”
“Nope. You’re getting pasta, but that’s similar.”
#75
“I mean the town is fine or whatever. It’s just that the quality of people is very low.”
#71
“And what exactly am I supposed to do about that? Sometimes two roads just diverge in the woods.”
#69
“It was so hard when I moved here because I had no small town skills.”
#66
“I accidentally pushed the wrong button and ordered two pizzas. The good news is that I will probably still be sad and hungry tomorrow.”